Monday, May 26, 2008 ; 1:13 PM
I was stunned,shocked...
a msg received from farid regarding my late friend,toh boon keong..
being a happy girl as i always potray on the outside,
i stunned for awhile..
and then resumed to..hey-you-must-be-kidding attitude..
but i msged mei sum asking for boon's number..
it was on 20th may 2008,just before dance started..
and a junior of mine actually asked me to teack 6-steps jazz walk in the dance studio..
my mind wasnt on teaching but on whether the news was true..i could not really focus..
then sha said"hey rab,ur friend called"
it was zul..i was like wth was he calling me up for..
besides those "prank" calls he used on me with his westernised accent..
this time no western accent..its just him...
he sounded sad..and down and serious..
this time..he told me the whole story..
about toh boon keong..
he read for me the article that was on the net..
i was like err..okay...
i sat at the stairs for awhile..and then went back in studio..
got a reply from mei sum regarding the unfortunate event..
i went in studio..and realised that i cant handle the emotions...
it started to erupt from me..
i told sha in broken words tt im gg out to cool myself..
i broke down at the stairs when reality seems to hit me...
i felt my heart just sank...
msging with meisum..who was gg to the wake that day..
asking if im going too.. i badly wanted to go..but was wearing a red shirt..
i missed him badly...
the next day..i went to the wake with my former classmates
lucy,wenyao,wee meng,susanti and luki...
i was in sucha state of denial..i didnt want to believe that he's gone..
we went to sin ming blk 37..
wen yao went up to the first wake he saw and asked if it was boon's wake...
i was lighted up again when i saw the photoframe wasn't his picture..
there was still a light of hope in me..
the thought of him still alive...and that they got the wrong person..
we continued walking..
and before i knew it..
I saw his picture on the photoframe..
the picture that i saw in his wallet back in secondary 4..
stubbornly,i still did not want to believe it...
we sat down gave the money to the mum...
put out bags and went to see him..
i was dying to see him again..
we went in...and i finally saw him resting there...
this time...i didnt see his smile anymore..
it was just him resting there with eyes closed..
thick make up...
i guessed the accident might be sucha blow that the scars were being covered with make up
my heart just sank there..
i could have cried my heart out but i did not..
i know i have to hang on..get a grip...
that was the last i saw of him...
on the table..he was offered his favourite roller coaster cracker...
before we left...we have the last look of him...
i miss him...
Labels: the wake of a friend
Staring blankly ahead;
Just making my way through the crowd